Oh, Liza Wang, only if you know that I've failed you yesterday.


Underlying Message is a funny thing.
A portrait, A lady in there holding weird things on their hands. Blood dripping at the thigh, but it looks like its PMS blood. With all the costume details, the headgear the robe the flags. And the dark shading behind the lady.

People stared at this potrait, some never said a word, some appreciated my effort ( thank you very much). But everything is not going onto the right track.

" you didn't push far enough.
i was expecting something more, but you missed it."





or something like that.
You didn't push far enough. I didn't push far enough.
You were expecting something more, but I missed it.

Deep down something tells me, go Liza Wang, go portrait, go montage, go sketch.
So I did followed my instincts, go Liza Wang, go portrait, go montage, go sketch.

I have a meaning for the rose, the planner, the male general headgear, the sitting poise ( which I never mention ), the blood and the two hands. I got the translation-into-space-speech ready. I was happy with my work, the ruined rose, the 2 days time spent is worth complimenting.

Should I just blame myself for not pushing myself to think more and more?
Or I already tried my best, but I didn't hit the bar my lecturer is expecting from the panel.
Which means that's the limit I can go?

The flags
The fire and wind patterns,
The robe
The ocean waves pattern,
The ivy above the waves,
That smile,

The pressure she had on her shoulders,
The wish she had deep down her heart, about running away from everything,
The sense of superficial that stopped her from being herself,
The balance she's seeking from her work.


Why had I never thought of those crap.
I can crap for the rose, I can crap for the blood,
why can't I crap for those things that he's expecting.


Did I pushed myself far enough?
I don't know.