Crushed Keat's

It's finally over.Everything.

The C-s in the Economics paper just now freak me out for a while.
Mum sms-ed asked me how's the paper

I smiled. I am happy with it I guess, so much better than the essay paper.
And Mum, Father's Day is on Sunday. chillax.

***

Can you believe it?
I can't. It's like one and a half year, done.


DONE.

No more sitting in the classroom making noises.
No more singing out loud in the library.
No more FTZ after class.
No more embarassing ourselves while changing class.
No more notes-copying, listening, and staring at the assets *ahem*
No, freaking, more college life.

For hours I've been thinking, NOW WHAT?

Seriously, NOW WHAT?

Prom is in 2 days.
Perhentian is in 2 weeks.
then what?

back to Perlis, car license, work, and what?






Part of my heart belongs to PE4.
and this part of heart is killing me now.

Too much love apparently.
It's 2.16am.

Time to emo.

Felix Saw
2.16am

Heroes meme, no?

I just pat a squeeze of Lux Aroma Therapy Body Shampoo on my hair while I was bathing A loud pat. Ew.





Pirates of Carribean 3 : At World's End is good stuff.

I like Johnny Depp a lot,maybe it's because of this character, the personality is very unique, the way Jack Sparrow,Captain, Jack Sparrow act and analyse every choices is very unique. He's the fun stuff of the whole show larh. And the proposal is the highlight of the whole show, and the turning-in-to-be-sex scene. Oh William Turner you foot fetish.


Hoist the Colors is a interesting song. Love it.


The king and his men stole the queen from her bed and bound her in her Bones.
The seas be ours and by the powers where we will well roam.

Yo, ho, haul together,hoist the Colors high.
Heave ho, thieves and beggars,never shall we die.

Some men have died and some are alive and others sail on the sea –
with the keys to the cage...and the Devil to paywe lay to Fiddler's Green.
The bell has been raisedfrom it's watery grave...
Do you hear it's sepulchral tone?
We are a call to all, pay head the squalland turn your sail toward home.

Yo, ho, haul together,hoist the Colors high...
Heave ho, thieves and beggars,never shall we die.

Humans that haven watch Pirates,



WILL TURNER DIED.

just,kidding.



Ya I am sick of being spoiled and yesh I am here to show you I spoil shows too. =)
Damn you Wan Yie.





Heroes Season 1 Finale is stupid.

Sylar is a dumbass. Terrible terrible dumbass.
He can stop 5 bullets that coming but he can't stop a not-serious-look-Hiro-Nakamura shouting at Sylar's name before running slowly and use the damn sword to stab him at his heart.


Now let's not discuss about the stupidity of the oh-i-can-cut-of-your-brain-so-fucking-easily Sylar in the last episode shall we?

Previously he was in Mohinder the stupid Indian's room while Peter came in and look for Doctor Suresh. So Mohinder was attacked and Peter face Sylar one on one. The idiotic emoistic Peter Petrelli with the na-na-na-na-na-i-am-invisible-and-i-dun-have-to-go-anywhere-cause-you-still-can-see-me-anyway thinking, chilling around after turn Invisible, while slowly Sylar telekinecise the broken pieces of the glasses that somehow appears to be on the floor and slowly concentrating the glasses and shoot it one shot, and before Sylar could manage to wonder where the hell is the hollow man went and oh, right in front of his face, with the back facing him. Oh then then Sylar simply got fainted hit by a blackboard, by Mohinder Suresh. ZOMG he can sense heartbeat and a spft gulp but didn't sense someone without power pushing the blackboards towards him. And the pissing-off-part is Mohinder Suresh left straight after Sylar fainted. Mahai if it's me arh, I already find some stuff and make sure that his brain crushed badly till it looks like some strawberry flavoured breakfast cereal k. The show is good, but it sucks when they are squashing everything into a simple 40 minutes instead of add up more episodes. Imagine in minutes every cast just appears in a scene. This is almost the crappiest finale ever bahhhhh.

American Idol is predicted like Keat and I guessed.
Jordin Won.yeay.

***

I don't feel like emoing here.
Next time larh.

Singapore,someone,Sinatra

A great gift from Singapore

Great Frankie

Thanks Yorsh

My knees are killing me.

My heart is killing me either.

I dare not to hope anymore.

I dare not to hope anymore.

Pressure given.

Tears fallen.

Happy?

Thanks for the call, thanks for the guidance

and thanks for making me fall.

Looking outside the window

"What's your birthday wish every year?"

An interesting question asked from an unexpected person.
For my whole 18 years life, what did I wished the most overall. I only can think of those stupid wishes I wished while I was a kid, naive one, that it seriously won't come true,and now, come and think about it that's what I seriously want.

I answered. and I heard same answer reflected back from him.

At least his' sound more logical.more, sense.
Homesick is getting serious. I missed them.

I always thought that wish will never come true. Maybe that's why I waste up the chances making stupid birthday wishes. Really stupid wishes.Maybe I should me more realistic. Maybe I can ask for a million pounds, a sport car, offers from good unis, a license - at least. Every time I made up the wishes and I will be like hey, why did I choose this wish instead of another again. Not to say that I am regret, just that once again, I am confused.

***

"What's the feeling of trying hard enough but didn't get the shits that you want?"

Believe me I would never have this feeling ever, okay maybe not ever,or I am not sure whether I tried hard enough last time, but until now, I never have that feeling before, not because I didn't got the shits that I want, just because I don't try hard enough to pursue it I guess.I don't get the feeling of trying hard enough, I don't know to what extend is enough,I don't know how much is enough, and now listen to the story come from the opposite, and compare his case to mine, I'm seriously an ass. I felt freakinly bad after we talked, feeling like slapping myself stabbing myself. He worked his ass off for the things he wants,he stands on his when it comes to study and work. I want to be like him,I am so damn envy of him, but I don't see the feeling coming right now. Now I feel fucked up.

***

"When life suck,life's beautiful"

That's the way I sum up life as. and he agreed. Life won't be beautiful if it's not sucky enough. My life sucks currently,I wish stupid wishes, I didn't try hard to do everything,and so obviously I don't get what I want, most of the time.No one get me, or hold me when I feels like falling, when I feels like crying. Good people cames in the wrong time, but I am glad they're there to help.I always made myself look miserable, and make people talk to me, make them approach me.
Now you see me ugly.
Now you see me ugly?


Luckily I still have you.
Family you,
friends you.
and you.

Shit happens recently.

Sorrow overwhelmed.

Tears dropping.

Shattered.
In pieces.

Disappointment.

Seperation.

Misunderstanding.

Conflict.

Betrayal.

Giving up on hope.

Life's that fuckingly, so damn fuckingly sad, isn't it so?

******************************************

And dear YOU :

You know what ? After I did so much for you then I realised, you don't even care about us. But I don't want to end up our friendship like this because I care about it more than anyone, any other of your friends I think. But now then I know you don't even care. So maybe I am stupid enough to trust and think that you still care of our friendship. Now it seems that you don't. I still keep the last hope in my heart and I insist not to let it go. I guess we'll see what happen soon.

Sometimes I really wish that I don't know you at the first place, at least now I don't have to worry this much on you.

Or maybe I am too perasan about us. I am too perasan that I thought I know you well but maybe I am not even close about it.

I guess we're on the same boat now, Farah.

You think you know me well

But you don't know me

yeemoe

I failed to sign up my blogger just now.
Failed to type out the password correctly for, 12 times.
I am so bored.

******************************************************

I once checked back my archives to see things that I've posted last year. Then I know I was once desperate for real friendship. Once posted those emo posts that actually meaningless and shit.having that feeling of wanting to understand more about you and wants you to understand more about me. You get what I mean? I still can remember that night when I was walking alone to KTM on my way home I messaged Melanie and asked her :

"Mel, have you ever feel like want somebody to be your best friends or be their best friend? I am feeling like that right now. Sad eh?"

Minutes later she replied :

" Yeah I totally get you, it's like feeling of wanting to belong..."

It's kinda blurry now for me to think back what we typed in actually but that's something like this. But yeah, I once having that kind of feeling and that's the first time I get so emo in my 17 years life.

I don't know why I typed this, maybe I am bored, maybe I am topic-less, maybe I am seriously ranting. I really wanna know what makes me that desperate that time. Cause I am not now.


"Felix, you know everyone." =)

Love Kills

Love kills.
Overwhelmed.
Relief.

I beg of you
Don't say goodbye
Can't we give our love just one more try
Come on let's start a new
Cause breaking up is hard to do

Renee Olstead feat. Peter Cincotti
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

Tell me about it

I broke my own home keys into half yesterday. It's an accident, don't ask me how, but it appears to happen. And I've forgotten to ask the keys from my sister and it turns out that I've saved 6 bucks today,thanks to Kameni for driving me home, and traded a 45-minutes-stuck-outside-the-house-payback.

So, guess what I've done while waiting for help. I spent some time find 3 sticks and some rope around the front yard. Oh, I only found 2 sticks from my own house and I stole one from my neighbour. Then I tied up the 3 sticks and try to use the long stick and hook my keys form the living room table outside though I know it's broke. Luckily my aunt came to the rescue and save me from doing idiot stuff and make myself fishy. Luckily none watching me or else by then, aunt have to come to rescue me, at the balai.

Was watching Veronica Mars, good mood, and one simple message ruin everything. Finally this day has come, though no one want this to happen, it's really sucks. Big one.Oh dear god, hopefully they are both fine.

Farah, please get well soon. Everyone in PE4 is worried about you.
and both of you, please be strong. I'm really speechless, really, speechless right now.
Tomorrow is going to be a sucky one.

Love kills.